There are 3 top things that will hold you back from achieving your goals, no matter how fabulous you are, we’re all human and we all suffer from at last two of them, and that’s if you’re lucky. For many of us, you’ll likely experience all of these things at some point. Don’t get me wrong, there are lots of things that can hold you back, but if you look hard enough, you’ll probably find that one of these is at the heart of it.

So, what are these mysterious demons and how do you slay them?!


There are so many things to be afraid of!

What will people think?

What if I’m rubbish at it ( whatever IT is)?

What if I make a …. MISTAKE and( loud gasp!)… FAIL?

What if I don’t know enough?

I recently interviewed an amazing woman who opened my eyes to the fact that what we call fear is in fact Fake Evidence Appearing Real. In other words, that thing you’re afraid of… is all in your head. Now there might be lots of reasons for this – and many likely limiting beliefs, but either way, the fear is perceived and not real – unless you’re being chased down by a tiger, in which case run!

Think about this- what sort of things do you tend to be scared of? I imagine you’re not facing wild animals in your business or daily life.

Say you have a big pitch or presentation – you’re scared you’ll be laughed off the stage or go completely blank and get geared. Has this ever actually happened? Sure, we’ve had it go wrong but to actually get slammed to your face – no.

Watch this great video of one of my favorite entrepreneurs Rebecca Hirst of Glorious Wellness in her first TEDx talk. Was she scared- Heck Yeah! but she did it and rocked! 

Click Listen to Rebecca’s interview with She Owns Success 

How about, you want to share something with the world on social but, maybe it’s a bit controversial, maybe it makes you feel vulnerable ( Live video!) – what if you get bombarded with hate comments and abuse – ever happened? OK, maybe that has…

You get the point though, these are the types of fake stories we tell ourselves. Our brain creates these untrue versions of the outcome of events that hold us back from just doing the darn thing and finding out what will really happen.

This is how it feels when you consider doing things outside of your comfort zone, so you should do something scary every day!

It might be scary outside your comfort zone but it’s also full of adventure and fun!

So my advice – get over it! People are not that mean ( OK most people :-)) Most people are so bombarded with information and general stuff going on in their lives that they won’t stop what they’re doing just to be negative about you for the heck of it. those who do – are haters and you’re too cool to be concerned with that!

2. Perfectionism

Surely it’s great to want to do things just right – perfectly in fact! After all, what you put out there is a reflection on you, so it needs to be perfect.

Ever created a plan, maybe you’re in the middle of writing your 20th business plan ( Well done you for writing one!). It’s nearly there, but it just needs tweaking.

Ok, it might be time to put down the pen!

There’s planning, then there’s over planning. It’s over planning and over planning and over planning- get the point?

Planning is great and it’s really critical to do because it’s the roadmap of how you’ll get to that amazing destination called success! Putting pen to paper crystallizes things in your mind and gives you a clear course of action.

The keyword here is action. You can only plan so much and even if you write 50 plans, you’re getting nowhere until you take action. Also, remember that things change and by the time you’ve lifted your head from that paper, the world is likely to be a very different place and your plan might not cut it in this new world!

So what do you do? How can you overcome perfectionism and move forwards?

By taking action. Almost any action is better than none at all and by taking that first imperfect step two thing will happen

  1. You’ll immediately feel more confident just by starting! Crazy but true- try it.
  2. You’ll get some results which you can learn from. If things need changing, at least the changes you make are based on what your customers and clients really want and not what you think they want. You’ll also save yourself time which is so precious and limited on this crazy entrepreneurial journey.


So Take Action. In the words of Emma Stroud the Co-Founder of Pitch Perfect Club  – Wherever you are on your journey, just start.

One small acton taken today will mean big results tomorrow.

 3. Negative Mind Set

Ok, this is the other #1 thing that holds people back.

Nothing can save you from yourself and your mindset is the thing that holds all the cards.

Your mind is like a lens that you see things through. It can be a bright, colorful, and fun, positive mindset or it can be grey, thick, and like a horrible fog – negative.

If you’ve ever been in a “bad place” mentally ( we all have) then you know that in those moments, or on those days, everything seems wrong, negative, and impossible.

In Summary

The benefits of a positive mindset can’t be underestimated! and that’s why it’s so important to stay positive and to protect your beautiful positive mind ( Yes, it needs to be protected from people and things that might not be so positive)

Here are just a few reasons to build, cultivate, and keep a positive mindset:

With a positive mindset, you will

  • Bounce back from knocks more easily
  • Be more creative
  • Spend more time focusing on what’s important to you
  • Have perspective 
  • Take more risks 
  • Get out of your comfort zone more 
  • Build more relationships 
  • Build better relationships 

The list goes on!

So take off those dark and dingy perspectives and look for the bright side because your business needs it and you deserve it.


Subscribe to the podcast to listen to fellow female entrepreneurs sharing their secrets to success and how they overcame these gremlins!

Take one action today and do one thing you’ve been putting off. Share your success in the comments below because we want to cheer you on!