As an introvert, I know there are some things I do that make complete sense to me and feel totally amazing but seem slightly odd to others. I know this because of the many comments and reactions I’ve received over the years. For example, I saw the look of wonder and sometimes concern on colleagues’ faces when I preferred to sit alone in the office, even on a hot summer day when everyone went out to sit in the park. And the protests of how I never answer my phone (which has become white noise to me!) plus the utter shock when I drive around in absolute silence – that’s right, no music or anything. Oh, and how I should get out more!

In this post, I’m sharing some of the things that introverts do that might sometimes seem strange but make complete sense—well, to us, anyway.

1. Looking Angry for Seemingly No Reason

Yes, introverts can often look severe or even a bit grumpy. Rest assured, we’re not silently cursing your existence. We’re probably just pondering some existential crisis on the planet. We’re not angry; that’s our thinking face.

2. Loving the Silence

Silence Is Golden, Not Awkward. For us, silence isn’t a void to be filled with chitchat. It’s something to be cherished and enjoyed. So, if we’re quiet in a meeting or at lunch, we’re not being rude; we’re just basking in the warm glow of peaceful silence.

3. Preferring Texts Over Phone Calls

“Ring, ring!” Who’s there? Not an introvert! As an introvert, I definitely prefer text over phone calls, and I’m not the only one. It’s not because I don’t like personal interaction but rather about controlling the timing, intensity, and duration of communication.

4. Enjoying Alone Time

While some might see wanting to be alone as anti-social, for introverts, it’s a way to recharge our mental batteries. This time alone is often when introverts feel most alive and invigorated.

For introverts, a perfect Friday night is a date with Netflix, a good book, or even just the wall. Solitude is not loneliness; it’s a blissful escape. It’s where we recharge with books and comfy couches.

5. Deep Thinkers and Observers

Introverts tend to be contemplative, often getting lost in their thoughts or deeply observing their surroundings. This introspection might appear as disinterest or aloofness, but it’s usually a sign of a rich, internal world.

We take People Watching to a whole new level, so if we seem lost in thought, we’re just being overly observant. That guy in the corner? He probably likes his coffee black. The lady with the red hat? She’s definitely a mystery novel fan. And we’re not judging, just heavily analyzing.

6. Avoiding Small Talk Like the Plague

Small Talk? No, Thanks. Big Thoughts? Yes, Please! Small talk feels superficial for introverts; we generally prefer deep and meaningful conversations. This can make social gatherings more challenging or less appealing.

While we might not be great with weekend stories, we can chat for hours about the meaning of life or the universe. Small talk is the bane of our existence!

But while we’re not always great at watercooler chitchat, we’re excellent listeners, so if you need someone to listen and provide thoughtful advice, we’re your go-to.

7. Choosing Solitary Activities

Introverts often gravitate towards activities they can do alone. Running, reading, gardening, or crafting, if it can be done alone, we’re into it. Group activities? Thanks, but we’ll probably pass!

It’s not anti-social; it’s just our social style. We love to enjoy our hobbies without the social fatigue that comes from large group activities.

This extends to group projects. We Have a Love-Hate Relationship with Group Projects. While we love contributing to team success, we prefer to do it through individual tasks.

8. Avoiding Social Events

Contrary to common belief, introverts are not anti-social, but we are selectively social. Think of us as the bouncers of our own social clubs. We’re not letting everyone in, but those who do make the cut are in for some seriously, deep and meaningful conversations.

Moreover, an introvert’s social energy is like a battery that drains quickly in social settings and recharges in solitude. Once our social battery is depleted, we might withdraw abruptly, which can seem strange to extroverts.

Spontaneous group lunches or last-minute meetings? That’s the stuff of our nightmares. A little heads-up can transform our terror into manageable anxiety.

And the less said about office parties, the better. If it’s not mandatory, we probably won’t show.

9. Lunch Breaks Alone

Lunch alone is not a cry for help, and seeing us eat alone shouldn’t trigger concerns. Sometimes, our lunch break is the quiet time we crave to recharge our social batteries.

10. Preference for Written Communication

Introverts often express themselves better in writing than in conversation.

Give us a pen, and we can turn into Shakespeare. Our letters might be epic; our voicemails, not so much.

11. Overthinking Before Speaking

Overthinking is our favorite Sport.

We don’t just say things. We think, rethink, and then think about thinking.

By the time we’ve got it perfect in our heads, the topic’s changed twice, or the moment’s passed.

Introverts think before they speak; this leads to editing our thoughts in real-time, which can lead to pauses that might seem odd in conversation.

12. Intensity in One-on-One Conversations

We introvert types thrive on deep, meaningful interactions, which can be overwhelming for someone not used to such intensity. You can be guaranteed we’re listening if we’re talking to you.

13. Crowd Allergy: It’s a Thing

Large groups or crowded places can overwhelm an introvert’s senses. We might seem uncomfortable or eager to leave in such environments, not because we’re anti-social, but because the overstimulation is exhausting (OK, sometimes it is the anti-social thing)

We prefer to spend time with people in smaller, more manageable batches.

And there you have it! The secret life of introverts, decoded. Remember, every introvert is different and has a unique blend of these traits.

Hopefully, this list has shed light on some introverted behaviors that might be misunderstood.